The Recession Drops a Personalized Bomb

The Impending AX:
So last friday, my boss took me aside ten minutes before I was to leave for the weekend, letting me know that a business meeting was scheduled for Saturday and they were looking at ways to cut costs. In other words...I was low man on the totem pole and first to be axed if push came to shove.
This wasn't a surprise. She's been hinting about the subject since Thanksgiving. As an employer that spends much time in social networking, and less in sales calls and aggressive marketing, the writing was on the wall. As her "sales assistant" too few sales have been coming across the desk. However, I can have a full time job just updating files...but that doesn't bring in MONEY. Sure enough, on Monday, I was given the termination agreement - with a generous 30 days in which to find new employment, which was thoughtful.

The Job Search:
I've been searching for another possible job, and sending out my resume, since her first warning back in November. I haven't received one reply. Now, I'm an admin with 25 years experience - I know how to type, run an office, etc. NO CALLS. Of course, the papers are full of sad stories of job fairs - 2000 applicants for 200 jobs. People are out of work city wide. I don't think my lack of response is so much about me, as about jobs in Tucson. period.

Money and Whining:
My husband lost his temper this week because my ex didn't pay for child support again. He's now owing for TWO payments. I've been this route before and recovery takes some time through the Wisconsin Court system. Anyway, this income is significant because I have a mortgage and second mortgage on the townhome.

Without disclosing too many details, my daughter and I purchased a modest condo/townhome 6 years ago in a great town school district. Stability and all that. My husband bought his house before we were married with 100 percent financing. So, we're in that recession "threshold" situation.

I think back to my happy days at my church job -- until the Pastor resigned due to illness and it became clear that the Council's political view was to start over with new, and cheaper staff. So my 7 years of loyalty and above and beyond work ethic was for naught. I think about the past 6 months at the job I have now, where my two co-workers average at least 2 days sick a month, and sometimes more like ten, * I haven't missed for one entire sick day, and once again, I face the ax.

I remember my pastor's sermon about bad things happen to good people. I also remember hearing a lot of "what goes around, comes around." It gets hard to stay positive. I KNOW other people have it worse, but I'm standing in my own shoes this week, not someone elses.

Bread Winning Ability:
There are positives! I have a REALTOR's license, and I have two listings. I have an e-book planned, (however, I don't think an e-book on Frugal Children's Parties will make the best selling list) I sell handpainted items: garbage cans for $16.99, suitcases, furniture--I've advertised on Ebay and Craigslist for years. So, there are options, as there have been my whole life long.

I just thought as I was approaching 50 that life would have gained some stability and security. So why am I sharing this with you? I suppose it comes down to honesty. I'm not just some person blogging on optimism and happy thoughts and positivity - I have my valleys, and I have my moutain summits.

...Maybe I'll find a flower meadow in this lowland I'm wallowing right now. :)

Happy April Fool's Day!!

A collection (with permission) of great April Fool’s Day compilations by a comedian speaker by the name of Scott Friedman. He can be found at www.FunnyScott.com. Enjoy!

1. I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

2. Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.

3. When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

4. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

5. If you ate pasta and anti-pasta, would you still be hungry?

6. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

7. Time may be a great healer, but it’s sure one terrible beautician.

8. Forget about World Peace . . . Visualize using your turn signal!!

9.Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

10. Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.

11. WARNING: Dates in calendar are closer than they appear.

12. Give me ambiguity or give something else.

13. Because madness takes its toll, please have exact change.

14. I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.

15. All I ask for is the opportunity to prove that money can't make me happy.

16. One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk about other people.

17. Some days you're the dog, and some days you're the hydrant.

18. Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn shop?

19. Is it possible to be totally partial?

20. You know it’s an April Fools kind of year when…you wake up screaming and you haven’t even gone to bed yet.

Happy Talk

Remember the musical movie, South Pacific? For some reason, the lyrics to Rodgers and Hammerstein's, “Happy Talk” has been whispering in the back of my mind for the past couple of weeks.

“Happy talk, keep talkin' happy talk, Talk about things you'd like to do. You got to have a dream, If you don't have a dream. How you gonna have a dream come true?”

How do YOU find your “happy place”? What lifts YOUR mood? I looked across the internet and did some twitter queries…here’s what I came up with. Feel free to comment with some more of your own!

• Smell a flower. (That always brings a smile to my face.)
• My mom always told me if I was feeling sorry for myself, to go visit someone else – especially the elderly. It never took long to quit focusing on me.
• Yawn and stretch. Seen a dog when he/she wakes up?
• Get out and exercise. Talk a walk or a bike ride! Go to the gym and push your limits.
• Polish a mirror. Smile at yourself, stick out your tongue!
• Brush your teeth.
• When I was a little girl, I used to spin. Spin in circles in our big back yard til I fell laughing to the ground.
• Make yourself a cup of hot tea.
• Brush your hair. Brush someone else’s hair.
• Drink two glasses of water, add a wedge of lemon or lime to it. Many times sadness is really just dehydration.
• Read the Bible. If you aren’t a big Bible reader, just open to Psalms or Proverbs…there’s always something there to touch you.
• Eat something healthy and fresh. Your blood sugar might have taken a dip. Set out a bowl of fresh fruits or vegetables.
• De-clutter a part of your home or office that needs it. Clean out your junk drawer!
• Reminisce. Look through your old scrapbooks, personal journals, blog archives, collections of your own paintings, poems, songs, yearbooks.
• Take a bubble bath.
• Watch the birds at a feeder or a hummingbird flitting around blossoms.
• Make a date night with your significant other, or one of your children – quality one on one time.
• Make lists. Who doesn’t like to cross things off a to-do list?
• Say a prayer. Give your problems over to God, Jesus, or your Higher Power.
• Turn on music. Use classical and jazz to de-stress; or energize with something lively.
• Write down and archive what’s bothering you. It’s amazing what a release it is to keep a journal or your thoughts or poetry.
• Call your mom.
• Make the decision: “History or baggage.” History can be the life events that shape us - our education, children, marriages, careers; all those things that come together to season us, to give us character, form, substance. Baggage is the emotional weight that drag after us, slowing (or even stopping) us from moving forward. Baggage has everything to do with our self image or how we feel about ourselves and then, how we perceive the world as treating us. History is who we are and what we’ve become over this thing called Life. (History and Baggage bullet is paraphrased from a blog insert written by Anne Perry)

What shapes you? History...or baggage? Where’s your happy place? ...keep talkin' happy talk, ...You got to have a dream, If you don't have a dream. How you gonna have a dream come true?”

We CAN do Something!!

Hi Readers:

About ten days ago or so, I wrote a post wondering about what can we do to help out. This past week, I came across this blog by Judi Moreo, a motivational speaker, and immediately felt that it would make a great followup. You can read the blog yourself, or subscribe, by following this link at www.Judimoreo.com:
http://www.judimoreo.com/ezine/archive/2009/0309.htm#article.
By the way, please feel forward to pass MY blogs on to your friends and relatives, and invite them to subscribe by filling in the email link at the bottom of my blog: http://swdeserthomes.blogspot.com. Thanks!

And so, without further explanation, here's something you can do!!!

Do Something

What have you done today? Sure, you got up, got the kids off to school, fed the cat, put in a load of laundry and made it to work. But what have you really done today?

Most people these days are so busy just getting by they don’t take time to think about what is really getting done. And, frankly, they just don’t care. It takes so much time and energy to accomplish the things that have to be done to insure survival, there is little left for figuring out what could be, if only we cared enough to make it happen.

Apathy, is the number one disease spreading around the world today. Somewhere between apathetic individuals with a total disregard for anything and extremists loudly and violently vocal about a single idea, there is a middle ground. It is a place where we all stop, think and do our part.

It doesn’t take much to pick up a stray piece of trash that has blown into the neighbors yard instead of just assuming someone else will take care of it. We all want ‘someone’ to “do something” about everything from the quality of education in our schools and the potholes in the road to the economy, global warming and world peace. We are all, each of us, that someone. And while we can’t just wave a magic wand and make it all better, we can do SOMETHING – anything.

Write a letter to your congressman/woman. Volunteer at your child’s school. Visit someone in a nursing home. Donate to a food pantry. Speak kind words, share a smile, help the gentleman in the wheelchair reach the box on the top shelf. Organize a carpool at your office or child’s school to save gas and the environment. Spend a few hours serving meals at your local homeless shelter. No matter how bad you think it is for you, there is always someone worse off than you who would appreciate a helping hand. Get involved. Hug a child, call your mom. If you don’t consciously get involved in life, in your community, in your job, you will wake up one day and realize that life just sort of happened. You didn’t live, you just took up space and air.

Stop waiting for things to get better...do something.

Positivity Is Positively the Best!

I ran across this blog and wanted to share it with everyone.
Let's, do, share and count our blessings!!

http://positiveenergy-polly.blogspot.com/
Let's have some Positive News for a Change!


"Life is too short to spend your precious time trying to convince a person who wants to live in gloom and doom otherwise. Give lifting that person your best shot, but don't hang around long enough for his or her bad attitude to pull you down. Instead, surround yourself with optimistic people." Zig Ziglar

"Positive anything is better than negative nothing." Elbert Hubbard

"Keep on going and the chances are you will stumble on something, perhaps when you are least expecting it. I have never heard of anyone stumbling on something sitting down." Charles F. Kettering

"Having a positive mental attitude is asking how something can be done rather than saying it can't be done." Bo Bennett

"Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure." Norman Vincent Peale

"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living; the world owes you nothing; it was here first." Mark Twain

All for now!

Cara

What Can We Give?

In a city, we often learn to shut out the view of the homeless, the beggars at the corner, the ragged newspaper salesman in the median, or the people with signs standing stooped at free way entrances. It’s painful. It hurts to know people have it so bad, and we really don’t want to see it.

It triggers my inner struggle. I’ve heard dozens of scam stories – the people who work the medians and then end their day driving home to their nice homes in their nice automobiles-- the one who brags how much money they scored in a day of begging, laughing that they didn’t have to work at all. There are scams on TV, the internet, and on the radio news of all types, classes, and professions.

But, you can TELL who is indigent. The leathered skin, the worn clothes, the gaunt bodies. They can’t be faking it. In this economy, it’s very easy to lose a job, and then your car, and then your home. When 2000 people in Tucson show up for 200 jobs at Target at a job fair..you KNOW it isn’t easy. Don’t we all need help some times?

I’ve done hundreds of hours of donated work in my life, and helped with March of Dimes, Retarded Citizens of Wisconsin, Northman Drum and Bugle Corps (a teen’s marching group – not helping homeless and poor, but providing opportunities for youth) Primavera, Interfaith Community Center, and the Tucson Food Bank – to name a few. It doesn’t make the desire to make their pain go away any less. And I know daily I have blessings so much more than so many.

This past weekend my husband and I had a date night, and decided to go downtown to the University District, with a detour into the Y Generation night life on Fourth Avenue.
The main university district was maybe 2-3 blocks long and well populated – a buzzing and upbeat location. We decided to walk the 7 or 8 blocks through the college residential area over to Fourth Avenue, the home of our twice-yearly Street Fair.

Right away it struck us was how dimly lit it was, and so sparsely populated for 7-8 pm Friday night. On top of that, we didn’t see a single police car, bike cop, or foot patrol the entire evening. About half of the reatil shops were closed up. The bars and restaurants were open and had small clusters of people spilling out of doorways.

We got nervous. My husband, the retired NY policeman, reminded me to walk with authority with my head up. I told him to look mean. (HA) We passed a few homeless sitting on the sidewalk and one man singing away with a tip jar. I thought about giving, but in the dark, I was afraid to open my purse. I was afraid to draw attention to myself.

After dinner, we left an Italian place and I had half my dinner. I’d specifically ordered a meal with two chicken breasts, intending to bring one home.

We started a brisk walk back, at this point just wanting to be home. I noticed we huddled closer together, especially every time we had to approach or were passed by strangers. The trees looked taller, the hedges more overgrown…we even crossed over to a more open side of the street. By this time my purse was under my coat. We confided to each other we were a little worried about mugging. There just wasn’t enough pedestrian traffic, or light, or patrol.

A young man with a backpack passed us and my husband thought he heard him ask for money. I heard different.

“Can I have your leftovers?” He asked. He asked again, very quick, without stopping his walk. I turned around and followed him.

“Sure”, I said. “I didn’t even touch it!” He grabbed it and hurried down the road.

My husband asked, “What did he ask for?” He looked down at my empty hand.

I said, “He asked for the right thing.”

He just wanted food, and it was something I could give.

It didn’t sound like a scam to me. How many of us would ask a stranger for food, if we actually had a choice?

We reached our car about 15 minutes later and my husband let out a deep sigh. We’re going to save Fourth Avenue for daylight hours from now on.

What CAN we give in these times?
I think times are going to be tough for a lot more, a lot sooner.
What can we give?

Thoughts on Social Networking

To be honest, I joined FACEBOOK mostly to keep up with my kids--spread over three states—from Alaska to Wisconsin to Washington. On my page, I mention I’m in Real Estate, and I sell crafts…but mostly, my aim is to keep an ear to what my kids post and talk about online, as well as keep up with other friends and family members. I don’t have a stylish, customized site, or music that starts up as you load my page, or any of the hundreds of gadgets and links one may have in order to be truly hip in the technological world of online networking. And, like many of my era, I struggle to MySpace and Twitter and Blog and Ecademy and Email and Skype…and I don’t do them all.

But, I love the little “gifts” of social networking; Photos and links to interesting things others want to share. This weekend I got a little message from a former boss/partner of mine whom I shared 13 years in the black tie dj entertaining business. It’s wedding promotion season in Wisconsin and the bridal fairs and shows have begun. Like our days of old, Joe has his system set up and is raking in the prospects. He wrote me to share that a photographer contact of ours stopped in to say hello, and had inquired after me – sending his hello via Joe through Facebook.

It was a warm spot all day and I mentioned it on the phone to my son the next evening. You know, sort of in the context of “Guess who remembered me!” because it’s almost 9 years since I’ve seen the gentleman. How nice to be remembered…and all that.

Not much further into the conversation my son mentioned that every so often, it occurs to him how very [SMALL, SHELTERED, NAÏVE] – he didn’t come up with the word he wanted to describe his rural upbringing in Smalltown, Midwest USA. So he illustrated his point. (I paraphrase) “Do you realize how little that photographer had on his mind, that he still thought of YOU after all of these years? Do you understand that just not that much goes on in Rural America….?”

Well, my happy little bubble burst as I thought of that. Perhaps the photographer wasn’t necessarily remembering ME so much as not that much has altered in the pattern of his life and he marks my absence because of it. Maybe that’s why the tendency to gossip is so rampant in Smalltown, USA? Not that much new, not that much different happens to disrupt a lifestyle that centers around folks and family.

Conversation pivots around folks and family. A professional in his business remembers co-workers in the industry a decade after the fact… People talk mainly…of other people. My son noted that the office turnaround in one of his Seattle places of employ has completely rotated in the past five years. No veteran staff. No history. No memories. Nobody remembers…

Days later, I find I’m still mulling the conversation over. I am also currently happy being almost anonymous in Tucson. But, I believe there’s a lot to be said for history, and relationships, and community. I LIKED being remembered by that Wisconsin photographer.


Social networking is the current way to “gossip” among folks and family in the age of computers. I use it almost daily to stay in tenuous touch with those I love and care about. And, hopefully, make a few new friends along the way. I’ll always be a small town girl and it just hit me that it’s so. My life has meaning because of folks and family.