Thursday, January 15, 2009

Thoughts on Social Networking

To be honest, I joined FACEBOOK mostly to keep up with my kids--spread over three states—from Alaska to Wisconsin to Washington. On my page, I mention I’m in Real Estate, and I sell crafts…but mostly, my aim is to keep an ear to what my kids post and talk about online, as well as keep up with other friends and family members. I don’t have a stylish, customized site, or music that starts up as you load my page, or any of the hundreds of gadgets and links one may have in order to be truly hip in the technological world of online networking. And, like many of my era, I struggle to MySpace and Twitter and Blog and Ecademy and Email and Skype…and I don’t do them all.

But, I love the little “gifts” of social networking; Photos and links to interesting things others want to share. This weekend I got a little message from a former boss/partner of mine whom I shared 13 years in the black tie dj entertaining business. It’s wedding promotion season in Wisconsin and the bridal fairs and shows have begun. Like our days of old, Joe has his system set up and is raking in the prospects. He wrote me to share that a photographer contact of ours stopped in to say hello, and had inquired after me – sending his hello via Joe through Facebook.

It was a warm spot all day and I mentioned it on the phone to my son the next evening. You know, sort of in the context of “Guess who remembered me!” because it’s almost 9 years since I’ve seen the gentleman. How nice to be remembered…and all that.

Not much further into the conversation my son mentioned that every so often, it occurs to him how very [SMALL, SHELTERED, NAÏVE] – he didn’t come up with the word he wanted to describe his rural upbringing in Smalltown, Midwest USA. So he illustrated his point. (I paraphrase) “Do you realize how little that photographer had on his mind, that he still thought of YOU after all of these years? Do you understand that just not that much goes on in Rural America….?”

Well, my happy little bubble burst as I thought of that. Perhaps the photographer wasn’t necessarily remembering ME so much as not that much has altered in the pattern of his life and he marks my absence because of it. Maybe that’s why the tendency to gossip is so rampant in Smalltown, USA? Not that much new, not that much different happens to disrupt a lifestyle that centers around folks and family.

Conversation pivots around folks and family. A professional in his business remembers co-workers in the industry a decade after the fact… People talk mainly…of other people. My son noted that the office turnaround in one of his Seattle places of employ has completely rotated in the past five years. No veteran staff. No history. No memories. Nobody remembers…

Days later, I find I’m still mulling the conversation over. I am also currently happy being almost anonymous in Tucson. But, I believe there’s a lot to be said for history, and relationships, and community. I LIKED being remembered by that Wisconsin photographer.


Social networking is the current way to “gossip” among folks and family in the age of computers. I use it almost daily to stay in tenuous touch with those I love and care about. And, hopefully, make a few new friends along the way. I’ll always be a small town girl and it just hit me that it’s so. My life has meaning because of folks and family.

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